Archive for the ‘Ex-girlfiends’ Category

Elisabeth Shue, Edgar Cayce, and J. Edgar Hoover

October 30, 2006

Good news,

I finished the weekly horoscope in record time. The ghosts of Edgar Cayce and J. Edgar Hoover told me what to do. I shouldn’t joke about that; a former girlfriend (a different one from the psycho) can no longer watch TV since the TV “tells her what to do.” She wanted to get married at one time; dodged that bullet.

Elisabeth Shue has still not shown up on my doorstep. Maybe she’s afraid she wouldn’t be able to handle all the sex; I dunno.

Anyway, check out the horoscope. If any of it comes true – PLEASE LET ME KNOW!

Remove the old paint first,

Glaston

WEBSITE UP AGAIN

October 23, 2006

Okay hippies,

My website, http://www.corpsey.com is up again. It should stay that way.

Good night

WEBSITE CHANGE

October 22, 2006

Hey fellow Pastafarians,

If you are going to visit my website, please go to:

http://www.corpseythebear.com

The other one is dead at the moment.

RAmen

Ex-girlfriend

October 19, 2006

Dear Nightmare Bitch,

Yeah, you know who you are. Thank you for placing the knife in my heart. You f*****g cow! You started out with good intentions, constant sex, loving cards, etc. Then the Satan you had bottled-up so well burst out and took charge.

I learned to not talk to you in the mornings, since it bothered your peace and quiet. You used sex as a weapon, and made me beg for love and appreciation. I put you into not just one, but two incredible carreers. You took my beautiful $40k car whenever you felt like you had to be the F*****g Princess in town. And the only way I earned a blowjob was if I jumped through all the hoops flawlessly every day. And you didn’t swallow, either.
Well, dear L.R (or L.W. as you were formerly known), I took that horrible relationship and sad little white-trash-life-of-yours and turned it into a movie that will be completed next year and shown at Sundance.

Thanks, you white-trash bitch, for making me a lot of money off your psychotic behavior.

Piss off…Ha-ha…

Molly’s B-day

October 15, 2006

Shut up and listen.

One of my oldest girlfriends turned… ummm…. became a year older today. She is an incredible woman who beat the odds against a very self-destructive lifestyle and has become everything I could ever hope for.

I love you, Molly. Happy b-day!